“Secretly pining” is one idea only the octarine ones will understand. So many forces have tried to keep us apart. We already know what’s going on beyond the material plane that is politically against the rules. I can already see the future dialectic if we were together, hint, it’s you saying “No you can’t”, and it’s strange to hear that from someone I’m already together with. “No we’re not”. Is that how you feel better? You do you, I’d only truly love someone who crossed the threshold to where I am.