Feeling wistful lately. I always thought there was maybe a 10% chance that Trump would implement a State of Exception and clean up shop, sometimes it seemed he gave hints that there was an even higher chance than that- in any case that’s about at 0% now. He kept slinging those stones at the (((WASP))) nest, so have to hand it to him, he might as well have been an “Independent” candidate, and I never expected something like that in my lifetime. There couldn’t have been a more opportune time to declare emergency powers than at the onset of COVID, the perfect pretext was right there. “That’s not who we are.” Who we are is to be doomed then I guess. Thankfully I don’t identify as an American anymore (I don’t think that’ll be enough to convince the Iranians to let me live there). I appreciate Trump because he freed up speech so crazy people like me could go off about this and that, it was a good time for thinking. Before the physical lobotomy there will be a mental lobotomy, and that’s what I expect soon here. Studying some of those Iranian peoples earlier I doubted that they could get very far on the plane of ideas because they’re often rural and thus have to focus more on farming, mere survival, and I can see parallels to that on their way in the future- in a culture of fear there can’t be much thinking. That’s another illusion that I doubt we’ll be losing anytime soon, that we genuinely live in a “1st world” country. No, we don’t, accept it. In Turkmenistan the screens tell the people they live in a free country too, and I bet they tend to believe it too, if the people here are any sign. They’re just so overwhelmingly powerful that I can start to understand the optics crowd. Seems I always thought we had a chance to overthrow them and maybe they were right that that is naive. Months of rioting and murder, going mostly unpunished and only lauded by the media, and then when our side wanders through the Capitol with smirks on their faces, next scene it’s a mugshot. If they make up some kind of baseless rationalization for why I should be imprisoned for these notes for a movie script of mine, I’m mostly wondering where I can get Plato’s dialogues custom-made with one of those leather-bound Bible covers with a cross on the front, just to throw people off in there. All the people in the world who truly deserve to die, there should be a VR video game involving that for kids to play, that’s all I’m saying. If you erase one side of the dialectic you’ve given up your right to be alive, it’s anti-philosophical and thus inhuman. Feds don’t strike fear into my heart and hopefully this has been a lesson to them and others. If you think spirituality is possible when you have to be subservient to the state 24/7 365 you probably have no idea what anything like that is in the first place. My idea of fun is destroying the foundations of what everyone believes in to such a degree that they’re afraid of saying my name, and then suggesting what to do about these delusional cowards who are incapable of responding to reasoned arguments, and in that regard I’ve had lots of fun. This is what being alive is about, I’m sorry you can’t do it yourself.