Ah I gave Puccini a try after reading that Badiou thing and my playlist eventually switched over to Erik Satie and I was so relieved. This is a “subjective” judgment one can scarcely describe. It’s like that with conversation though too. “Alright, I’m speaking here with someone who is very far away from God” essentially. Then I x out of the Satie now too because sometimes silence is preferred. How many of your conversations are actually something you want to x out of? Probably more than most are willing to admit. Like I was talking about earlier regarding the people who are “quarter slaves”, no one really wants to talk to them, they do it out of necessity because they’re bureaucrats themselves and they’ve decided to make it with the world. In an ideal world they’d never even want to hear them speak at all. It reminds me of people who go play golf for “fun and business”, you can’t expect real people to be there, it’s always about business. What fun is that? It’s not only about fun, it’s about spiritual fulfillment. There are things beyond “fun”. Arguably, the only true way one can have fun is with someone who you don’t see as some kind of bureaucrat. And that’s dangerous these days with all the surveillance. You better watch what you say, because even if you’re with someone you Trust, others might be listening in. “People being real” isn’t something that’s really possible today. Speech always takes place within the horizon of paranoia. Some might think I’m exaggerating when I invoke the idea of “technological totalitarianism”- I’m not. It’s only going to get worse from here. The nerd losers who want to be “spies” will be keeping tabs on you for the state. That’s the kind of person who’s going to be keeping you from actually being yourself with others, some bespectacled tech dork. Is that the future you want? Many many people don’t care if that’s the case because they’re part of the movement that seeks to enforce feeling sorry about them. You’re watched so closely because they don’t want you judging others. Why is that, could it be because they deserve to be judged? I wonder who is in control of all this, possibly the ones who’ve been kicked out of over a hundred countries? It’s such a mystery. You have to be a bureaucrat even with your closest friends because merchants with a historically immoral religion don’t want you asking questions about them, are you happy about that? Even in your own home you’re probably paranoid about making any remarks that would offend people from the jungle. That’s a sign that you are damned. The only way I’m playing golf with someone like that is using their head as the golfball. The only way I begin a conversation with a potential friend is remarking about how mostly only bureaucrats are possible as friends. The only way I speak with women is telling them the whore problem and gold diggers lead me to preferring to jerk off. Don’t like that, okay, I don’t want you as a friend or more than that. I live as if I’m not constantly being watched by the surveillance state, even though I know I am, and they gradually chip away at someone like me over the years. What are you doing instead? Settling for liars in those you surround yourself with? So ~meaningful~.