Jeez Badiou, how do I even decide which chapter to look at first, they’re all so tempting

Day after day, it’s the one thing missing in my life.
Not to be obnoxious and ask “What is” questions, I do wonder what it is though.
It seems cheap if it’s just mutual affirmation. That’s what it seems like a lot of the time, people want another to approve of them, and that gives them self-esteem. Being realistic though that’s probably part of it. I guess I always think of Kant as usual- you don’t want to be seen as a means to an end. Say all the people you might work with for instance, that’s a bureaucratic relation, thus you’re all means for each other. That’s why I have lots of dark thoughts about this though, because that’s what love seems to boil down to a lot of the time. Frequently people use each other too boost their own status. That’s a form of “using someone” in my perspective. Personally I just want to be able to respect someone, outside of the realm of society, in order to love them. I have a double-standard at this rate- I don’t expect women to be higher initiates in the Golden Dawn. So my respect for them is different from my respect for men. Not a Golem? Is that so much to ask? The answer is yes, it is too much to ask. In our political order it’s like the old days of women loving Jesus before they love you, except it’s they love Judaism before they love you. That’s why I think heretics have a role which necessitates being alone. For that reason I don’t hold back about certain because I already know that alienating people is just part of the role. With Judaism they’re promised to be recognized as a higher initiate of the Golden Dawn so to speak, and that’s just lying to them. They like that lie though. I don’t think it’s just the Jewish spirit either, because many Orthodox Jews seem to have the right idea about most things- it’s an entwinement between Talmudists and Saxon Levelers. I’m not sure if even the richest ones among them will make it out alive. It’s too many generations of accepting deceptions as dogmas, and even the highest elites are probably victims of that. Nah, I expect the very pinnacle of the pyramid will survive. Which just goes to show you that they have a different idea of “life and morality” than the kind they feed to those below them. They’re allowed to have “aristocratic beliefs”, while they want the plebs to have pleb beliefs. And they do, no matter what I tell them they will continue to see pleb morals as absolute.
What was I talking about again? The above is just the barriers I see.
That we can encounter and experience the world other than through a solitary consciousness: any love whatsoever gives us new evidence of this.
“any love whatsoever” – yeah, golem-love will only give you scant evidence of this.
Two Jewish slaves loving each other, that’s so sad I can’t even laugh at it. Okay never mind, it did give me a laugh.
Anyway I spare you the “excessively French” moments in Badiou, and I find the following somewhat “touching”
the entire meaning of two lives that have met, paired off, that will engage in the extended experience of the constant (re)-birth of the world
One of the reasons people hate me is because they know I’m right about the Mammonite Question. People see the one they love as a means to an end. In other words, the theological-political precedes love. A good “society-bot” is what they’re after. They love Jews, not you.
Too much to hear?
Arguably, love is supposed to precede theology and politics. Or put differently, one of the main reasons we have theology and politics is for love. If your theological principles and your political precepts are not correct then there won’t be love in your society.
I mentioned earlier the concept of scooting the cauldron up to the TV and watching the game while boiling in excrement. Who could love that? That’s what’s demanded of us. Our political order revolves around Jews being happy, it’s all about them. And sadly I doubt that even they are happy. “I love the egregore, honey, whoops I meant to say I love YOU!” That’s not even the half of it either. The Jew and Saxon ethos have fused such that the Jews themselves see themselves as goyim and thus hate themselves. This is a psychological subtlety I’m not going to try to explain here. “Even Jews are Hitler!!” Purely crazy people.
Why do I even bother to talk about this to people who have demonstrated to me that love is non-existent and they’re content with that? All anyone can do is prove me right that it all boils down to means-to-an-end relations.
in retrospect it doesn’t seem at all random and contingent, as it appeared initially, but almost a necessity.
Has that happened to you for a while?
Not to be a nerd, I think this itself is a refutation of the Parmenides. Existence seems to be about two, not “one”. Only the two make one.
Okay okay it IS about one. See, you can go on literally forever with that dialogue.
This is a really human moment which I don’t even want to post about to tell you the truth
The declaration of love… is the moment when chance is curbed, when you say to yourself: I must tell the other person about what happened, about that encounter and the incidents within that encounter.
Being a political pariah I doubt that will ever happen, and I think that’s one of the main reasons people avoid it. A declaration of HATE you can expect instead. I love God more than I love people, that’s why I do it. That’s another 2 and 1 dynamic.
Imagine this

Just documenting to you why my life feels meaningless.
“AND YOU DESERVE IT FOR QUESTIONING US!” Our political order revolves around pretending you aren’t niggers, I’m not going to play that game. Anyone who does play that game isn’t someone I could ever love.